Sunday, 28 May 2017

When a Celebrant has no words

When a Celebrant has no words.
When we meet someone who has suffered a great loss, most of us are terrified that we will say the wrong thing; that we will blurt out the wrong words and add to that person's unimaginable pain.
I had hoped that as a Celebrant I would somehow learn the right thing to say, that I would conquer my fear.
I haven't.
There are no right words to say to a parent who has lost a child....

Each person is different and what may comfort one may hurt another.

The most important thing I have learnt is that you have to approach with love.
I have to be brave enough to listen and learn of the depths of love they had for their child.
That I can draw courage from the strength that love gives to a family.
And just for a little while, I have to learn all I can of the unique beloved person they have lost, so that I can love them too and create a ceremony that is worthy of them.
So although I still don't have the right words for that first painful meeting, I now accept that my fear is natural and that it is all worthwhile because everyday I am learning how to find those perfect words that make up my ceremonies.
So that together we can celebrate a unique and beautiful life.

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